We’re always in a quest for the best gadget ever, a perfect device to fit our modern lifestyle, one that improves our daily life, does everything and connects with everything. Guess what? We have it already. And it’s not the smartphone.
It’s better than that.
You get it tailor-made for you, it always updates by itself, it comes with the possibility to install whatever app or plugin you can think of and never requires an internet connection. On top of that all, it’s open source. For the not so tech people out there, open source means that it’s free forever and that the more people work to improve it, the better.
Are you charging your smartphone three times a day? This device can last for days without being charged, and the best thing is that it comes with the possibility to recharge it by using whatever means you have at your disposal: sitting on the grass under the sun, listening to good music, being around with friends, going for a jog, sleeping, reading a book, walking in nature and many, many other ways. You can even mix charging methods for better results, like hiking and sleeping under the stars or reading a book while lying on the grass. No sun available? Dancing in the rain seems to work as well. The best method though appears to be sleeping, and curiously enough, that’s exactly what we do every night. So there’s no need to carry a charger. Couldn’t be better, right?
It’s got the best to-do list app, always leading you in the direction you seem to desire the most. If you feel like spending your days doing nothing, it keeps finding you opportunities to do just that. Want more money? It always finds new ways for you to make more money. You want more cookies? Somehow, it’ll show you the path to the best cookies in town. With this device, you’ll never forget what you want to do. It’s always adjusting to your true needs and desires while completely ignoring everything else.
It even updates your status, so you don’t need to do it by yourself on Facebook. Had a bad day at work or feeling like crap lately? It’ll update the status by itself and post it right on your face for everybody to see. Met the love of your life? Everybody will know that by looking at your face. Pretty cool, don’t you think?
The Best Gadget Ever
Meet the best gadget ever. It’s The Brain. Yeah, the one we get for free at birth. It comes with an automatic mechanism called Learning so with each life experience it gets better and better without you having to press any buttons. And by being open source, anybody can work on a way to improve it and then share the results with the whole world. It comes wrapped in a hard waterproof case so you can use it anytime, anywhere, with zero worries. And guess what? You can’t forget it anywhere. Somehow, you always seem to have it with you, even after those awful drinking nights. Isn’t that something?
Trying to capture that wonderful moment and store it on your phone but you just ran out of memory? Use the Brain. It comes with a default app called Memories. It’s automatic, and it’s always up to date, showing you the most relevant content. The best thing is that the more you use this app, the more storage space you get. If you only use it for two or three pictures now and then and for reminding yourself the street you live on, it will expand to meet those requirements only. But if you want to store more than the basic stuff, use it and it will grow. If you don’t care about some past moments, there’s no need to worry as the Memories app has an automatic process that discards whatever is unimportant for you without having to manually search and delete those items. It’s called Forgetting. Another advantage over the more modern gadgets is that you can store those wonderful moments in any format you want. There are no limitations or expensive system requirements.
Need to solve a problem you might have and you’re searching for the perfect tool? Well, there is this Brain app called Critical Thinking that comes installed by default and helps you find solutions to most of life’s problems.
What about Privacy and Security?
So far so good. But what about Privacy and Security? Everyone seems to be concerned about their privacy and security nowadays. Well, I can tell you that there are no security and privacy concerns when it comes to using the Brain, though we can argue a little bit about something called Stupidity. Specialists state that it’s only a bug of the automatic upgrade system. It somehow prevents the Brain from upgrading itself to newer versions, resulting in the user often engaging in dubious questionable actions.
The thing is that some people like to have all kinds of complex apps and plugins installed on their Brains. If you can configure them to get more out of your Brain, good. But there are people who hate configuring their devices. They take them as they come by default, install some basic apps and that’s it. They’re set. It’s the easiest way for the user. Others even go further and ask someone else to install them the Autopilot app. It comes under many names, like Be-a-Sheep or Go-With-the-Herd, but it does the same thing. It leads the user through life without straying too far away, without too much of a fuss. As the latest research shows, Stupidity is only a lifestyle. An easy one. And I can’t blame anyone for using it.
The User Experience
The Brain is the most user friendly device ever invented. It’s the best gadget ever. You can do whatever you want with it, use it in ways you can’t yet imagine, but if you want to keep things simple, you have the possibility to configure it to stay out of your way. It’s only a matter of preferences.
While there are no known privacy and security issues, there’s still a firewall. It’s called Fear. It prevents the user from doing actions that endanger his own life. For example, after a negative event, the firewall connects with the Memories app to store important sensory cues as warnings or dangers. It’s always updated through a background automatic process. If you’re an advanced user, you can play with the Fear a lot and even install some plugins. The Fear-Everything-that’s-Not-in-My-Bubble plugin prevents the user from doing much at all. The No-Fear plugin on the other hand, well, I’m sure you get the idea of what that does. Combined with the Stupidity bug it can have devastating results for the user. It’s not used by many people though, simply because there just aren’t too many of those left around on Earth.
Now these are extreme cases that I’m talking about, but you can adjust the settings to match any kind of lifestyle.
Another very important advantage of the Brain is that it can connect with any other device we use. It doesn’t matter what version or operating system the other device has. You can connect with anyone, anywhere. I even heard about a plugin called Telepathy. They say it might replace today’s smartphones. I don’t know too much about it and never saw someone using it, but I guess that if we use our Brains a lot, the new upgrades will have that plugin installed. Who knows what the future will bring?
From time to time, users experience conflicts with other devices, but it’s actually a matter of the plugins one uses. For example the Smart-Ass plugin, the I-don’t-Give-a-Fuck-About-Anyone plugin or the Because-I-Said-So plugin. The latter is most often than not used by parents and teachers to force apps into children’s new Brain devices.
Some other plugins that may cause slight troubles to the average user are the BC/AC plugin (Before Coffee / After Coffee) or the I-don’t-Feel-Like-Doing-Anything-Today plugin. But you can always uninstall them and find better ones to replace these if you truly want to. Yet most people don’t.
There is one good overall plugin you can use in most of the situations in life and it’s called the BS-Detector (Bullshit Detector). Think of it more like a filter for the every day life in our modern society. This helps you cut the crap and focus on what matters most to you.
Some Final Thoughts
Sometimes your device might get cluttered and feel like everything is messed up inside there. Don’t worry, leave it resting for a couple of hours or even days if it’s that bad and it will get back to normal. It always does, and every time it does that, it gets back better. As I said, it upgrades itself after each use. To speed up the decluttering process, you can use the Talk-With-a-Friend or See-a-Therapist plugins. So far, these two are rated with the best results.
Unlike other similar devices – which only degrade with use – the more you use the Brain, the better it gets. Try it and you’ll understand.
More than that, to help us upgrade our devices, nature started a very funny and interesting contest, called Survival. The main idea of the contest is that the people who find the best way to use their devices, they win. There are infinite ways of doing that. You can play this game by yourself, or you can connect with others in larger and larger networks to come up with better game strategies. There is no right or wrong. Choose your own way to play the game, but know there are no cheats. It’s all in the mastery of the Brain and its apps and plugins.
It’s also reported that the frequent use of this device might change your life for the better. Try it now and if you’re not happy with the results, you can always revert back the changes or even stop using it. It’s that simple.
And be sure to remember it’s free and it always will be.
Images taken from Pixabay.